My other little sister, Liz, wants me to do something different for Lent. I wouldn't have ever come up with this.
Instead of giving up something, she wants me to write down one positive thing everyday. The goal is to work on my confidence - which, unfortunately, is something in which I am VERY lacking.
I couldn't put my finger on where this exactly became my trademark problem. For a large part of my life, I am fairly confident in my ability to accomplish goals. However, there are a few notable facets of my existence in which I feel little more than inept:
1) Martial Arts - OK, this isn't the big one. Heck, I work hard at this & enjoy it so I wouldn't say I feel
completely inept. Actually, I'm not bad at all. I'll never be of the ability I'd like, but it won't stop me from trying.
2) Socially - I've always felt a bit awkward in this area. I was pretty outgoing when I was young & became more introverted as I got older. It was around the time we moved from KY to SC, I think. I don't believe I got the best reception there & it just stuck with me. School can be rough that way.
3) Women - Yeah, this is the BIG one. Look, I know everyone has their sob story about the other gender & I can't say mine's so different from anyone elses. My biggest problem is completely not believing I have anything to offer over any other guy - that a woman would do just as well, or better, with someone else. Essentially, that I can't compete. Not helping is the fact I've only ever had one woman who said yes to my asking her out. In all other cases it's blind dates, friends setting me up, etc. Getting shot down repeatedly doesn't temper you for the next round, it tends to wear you down a bit.
So, I have to overcome all the above (the 1st one will be easy) & manage to write something positive about myself for the next month. I can do this, I'm sure. How it'll make me more confident is something of which I'm not certain.
How do I manage to convince myself I DO have a lot to offer, I'm a good person, etc? Friends tell me this all the time but they are, by association, a little biased to my side of things. What can I find in me that reinforces those statements & gives me the confidence to move beyond this weakness in my personality?